May 312011
 

Core Parenting. Parenting from the Heart. That is our basic premise. In today’s world, parents can get overwhelmed and bogged down with  all the advice. Do this, don’t do that. And then two years later, do the thing we told you not to. It makes everyone crazy.  We worry incessantly that something we are doing or not doing is going to stand in the way of our child having the optimal childhood. On some level, we believe that making the “wrong” parenting choice equates to not loving them enough. But what we rarely remember is that somehow Mamas have been loving their babies since the dawn of time. Monkeys do it, whales do it. Women in villages without internet, self help books, or parenting tips on the evening news. Maybe, we “know” too much for our own good. Maybe all this “knowledge” gets in the way sometimes. And then again, maybe all the people who claim to “know” how we should parent, really don’t.  Just in the past few years, recommendations have shifted, changed and looped back again. Cry it out, don’t cry it out, wear your baby, don’t wear your baby, don’t feed them peanut butter, feed them peanut butter…..you get the idea.

What mama’s a hundred years ago lacked in a bombardment of “fact and recommendations” from  experts around the world, they made up for in community. Grandma’s, aunties, and sisters were part of the picture, building a community of women to give support, advice and love to mama’s, papa’s and little ones. Today’s family is strikingly different. Isolated from family many families get most of their support and advice through books and the internet. Many stay at home parents spend most of the days with no one other than their child. We have made up for lack of parenting community with accessible knowledge. But we as parents are more alone than ever. Especially when that knowledge doesn’t work or fit for our family.

I want to start a movement where moms can just go back to trusting their hearts, listening to their own voice and their baby. A movement that allows each mom, baby and family to be unique, and for each parenting decision to be okay as long as it comes from love and support. I want moms to walk away from one size fits all parenting guides and turn towards their own networks of friends and family. I want us to become our own experts on uniqueness.

Core parenting is about finding and nurturing our core selves as parents. It is about valuing and trusting our unique family.  It is about building a core community of others around us that can fill in the empty space that parenting books just can’t fill.  Parents, Family, Community. A threefold path to happy children and happy parents. Maybe we can just learn to enjoy babyhood without worrying that we are ruining our children by doing or not doing every little thing….Maybe we can relax. Breath. Look at our children and know that all they really need is us to be their family. Everything else, well…we probably are doing it wrong according to some expert but in the end, they will grow up just fine. And we may just smile more along the way.

 Posted by at 7:00 pm

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